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Is It Okay for Wedding DJs to Play Music With Explicit Lyrics?

by Chris Brower
Last Updated: January 8, 2024

 

It seems like more and more music these days has explicit lyrics. This creates a conundrum for wedding DJs: Should you play only clean versions of these songs, or should you play the “real thing”?

There’s, of course, no easy answer. However, there are several good practices that can inform your decision.

Remember, each wedding is unique. Your choice of yes or no can vary based on the wedding and the clients’ preference.

Let’s get into some ways to approach this topic.

 

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What Does the Couple Want?

The couple are your clients. You’re there to play what they want.

Play what they want, and they’ll be happy.

If they want explicit music, go for it! If they don’t, don’t!

I always ask them this question in my Reception Planner document:

Should I keep the music free of profanity? Is there any point in the evening at which profanity in the music is acceptable? [Note: I never play music with profanity, unless I’ve received your approval here and the explicit version was specifically requested. I have/can get clean versions of almost any song.]

That way you leave it up to them.

And notice that second part, “Is there any point in the evening at which profanity in the music is acceptable?” This is big. A lot of couples appreciate this question.

Many want some explicit songs, but they’d rather save that for later in the evening after children and older guests have likely left.

I also make it clear in my question that I can get clean versions of almost any song.

Giving them these options reduces the likelihood they’ll be unhappy with your selections, as far as profanity goes.

 

You Can Also Ask During the Wedding Reception

While I recommend asking them their preference before the wedding, you can also ask during the reception if needed.

You don’t want to do this constantly, but it’s okay to check every now and then.

In 2020, when “WAP” by Cardi B (featuring Megan Thee Stallion)* was popular, many guests requested it. As this song is particularly explicit, I often checked with the couple before playing it.

I asked first of all if they were okay with me playing it. I also said that I could play the clean version or the explicit version, whatever they want.

Of course, if the couple had directly put it on the “do not play” list, then case closed, I didn’t play it.
 


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The Argument for Not Playing Explicit Music

Weddings tend to have people of all ages and backgrounds. Hence, it’s likely that at least some of the guests will be annoyed or offended at hearing profanity in the music.

Many people view weddings as family-friendly events, and thus, in their opinion, wedding receptions should not have any profanity whatsoever.

People also tend to assume the wedding DJ makes all the choices themself. So, even if the couple was the one to ask for an explicit song, guests may put the blame on you.

Of course, a simple rule of weddings is: you can’t please everyone! No matter what you play, people will be annoyed you didn’t play their favorite song or more country or less country or more slow songs or fewer slow songs, etc.

First and foremost, you are there to DJ for the couple. They are your client. They dictate things. If they want explicit music, my feeling is you should fulfill that. It’s their day. They’re paying you.

 

Some Wedding DJs Say “Never”

However, I know some DJs who will not play explicit music, even if the couple has asked them to. In fact, some include this in their contract (that they won’t).

Their argument tends to go that it could make their wedding DJ business look bad.

As previously said, no matter what you play, some people aren’t going to like it. Some may voice their complaints to you that night. But that’s likely as far as it’ll go.

It’s unlikely they’ll go on some social media campaign to besmirch your business or start trolling you with one-star reviews, unless you REALLY go out of your way to offend people with your behavior. But if the song has some f words? Probably not.

If you’re very uncomfortable playing music with explicit lyrics, even if the couple has asked you, you need to be upfront about this during the booking process. You may lose some business, but at least a couple who hired you won’t be mad later.

 

The Argument for Playing Music With Explicit Lyrics

A lot of people love explicit music. And a lot of those people would love to hear it at their wedding.

Try as we may, many people still have a negative connotation about wedding DJs: that we’re all unhip dorks who only want to play “Y.M.C.A.” and the “Chicken Dance” and other tired, old songs.

Therefore, many people are excited when wedding DJs can create more of a party/club feel for their wedding reception than a cheesy high school dance vibe.

For many of the guests, these songs are ones they used to listen to in college or when they partied at bars in their twenties – so playing the songs exactly as they remember them can make them happy.

It’s not to say that the only way to be a “cool” DJ is to play music with explicit lyrics. Of course not! But honoring the vibe the couple wants will go a long way toward making people like your wedding DJ business.

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You Can Always Play the Clean Version

Most hit songs with explicit lyrics also have clean versions available. If the couple wants certain songs but doesn't want profanity, you can play the clean version.

Some artists record clean versions of their songs, replacing the explicit words with other words. Some don't, but a clean version is made during the song's production, where the explicit words are simply not there. In general, it's not something intrusive like a beep or bizarre sound effect.

iTunes and Amazon are a great place to get mp3s of clean versions. Also, a lot of compilation CDs will be all clean, such as GRAMMY nominee albums and the Now That's What I Call Music! albums. Some examples include:

Note: Even if you play the clean version, people might sing the explicit lyrics. Not necessarily a big deal, but something to keep in mind if the client is particularly adamant there be no profanity whatsoever. One time I DJed a middle school dance. The school was adamant I play only clean music. Fine. So I played a clean version of "Starships" by Nicki Minaj. But whoops, those kids sang along, including belting out all the profanities. Whoops!

 

What Do I Usually Do About Music With Explicit Lyrics?

As the statement above in the Reception Planner says, I tend to only play clean versions of songs unless the couple has told me they want the version with explicit lyrics.

When I have played the version with explicit lyrics, I've never had any problems. No one complained to me or stormed out and left me a scathing review online. I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of people didn't even notice.

Certainly, I never use profanity when I emcee. Better to keep it clean. Let people curse during their speeches or in the song selections, but not you yourself.

 

Conclusion

As with all things, I let the couple's wishes guide my music choices that night. Play what they want, and you'll make them happy.

 

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