What If a Wedding DJ Gig Goes Bad?

by Chris Brower
Last Updated: September 24, 2021

It happens to the best of us: A wedding DJ gig goes bad. Some issue (or several) pop up that make the night a struggle or just plain awful.

Perhaps no one is dancing, your equipment malfunctions, or someone is upset by something you did or didn’t do.

So what can you do to solve the problem that night or in the days after?

For the sake of this article, we’ll focus on issues that affect the couple and their guests enjoying your DJ services that could possibly be your fault. It’s most likely not your fault, for example, that the venue’s A/C broke in August or that two of the groomsmen got into a fight.

First, let’s dig in to the common reasons why wedding DJ gigs go bad.

Common Reasons Why DJ Gigs Go Bad

No matter what you play, no one is dancing. You’re playing songs the couple asked for, plus songs seemingly guaranteed to fill the floor, but still, no one is dancing. The “party” you assumed would happen is simply not happening. Everyone looks bored or leaves early.
Your DJ equipment is malfunctioning. Sound isn’t coming out of your speakers, or it’s distorted or sounds funny. Something breaks, or for whatever reason, won’t work as it should. The flow of the night is interrupted by technical problems, or certain things can’t happen because equipment isn’t working.
You’re unprepared/disorganized. You got the start time wrong, or you announced a wrong name or botched some other thing that was supposed to happen. Perhaps you simply acted unprofessional.

No One Is Dancing

Some weddings, no matter what you do, can be impossible to get people to dance. You can play the songs the couple asked for, requests from guests, and songs that seemingly always work, and nothing will work.

There are a few great strategies you can try to get a dead dance floor going. These have been covered more in depth in the aptly titled article, What If No One Is Dancing?, but here’s a quick summary:

Play a Group/Line Dance – You can often wake everyone from their slumber by playing “The Cupid Shuffle,” “The Cha Cha Slide,” “The Electric Slide,” and other songs with choreographed dances. For some reason, people love these songs and will rise from their chairs and dance.
Play a Slow Dance – Some people who generally hate dancing will, okay, fiiiiine, dance to a slow song. Or, even if they’re not interested in dancing, maybe their partner will drag them out to the floor. Boom, you just got two people to the floor (and hopefully many more).
Play a Sing-Along – Some people love belting out songs with their friends. “Piano Man” (Billy Joel), “Friends in Low Places” (Garth Brooks), “Sweet Caroline” (Neil Diamond), and more can work well.
Announce a Group Photo – Coordinate with the photographer to invite everyone to the dance floor for the photo. Once it’s over, play a popular song and people might be more likely to stay on the dance floor and dance. Heck, they’re already there! And in a crowd of friends and family too.

Some groups simply aren’t dancers. Some are shy about dancing or simply don’t like it. Some would prefer to just hang out and chat or take advantage of the open bar. Some prefer hanging outside and smoking.

That said, I’ve had some weddings with minimal dancing, where I was sure the couple would be disappointed in me, but then they said, “Hey, that was great! Thanks!” and still gave me a great review.

So, while of course you don’t want little to no dancing, there’s always the chance the couple will still be happy.

Ready for the complete guide to becoming a wedding DJ? Here you go.

Your DJ Equipment Is Malfunctioning

One of themes of this website is have backups of your DJ equipment, as much as you can. You need a lot of DJ equipment. If you only have one of each, you could be screwed if it stops working. Cords will not work properly, a speaker will make a weird noise, or something else may malfunction.

It’s guaranteed to happen sometimes.

If you’re prepared with backups, luckily you can pretty quickly swap things out and get on with the night. Phew.

I think most couples and their guests won’t get too upset if there’s a short delay of a minute or two, while you swap out a cord or grab a different wireless microphone.

Ideally, have some backups nearby (just a few feet away), so you’re not forced to run outside to your car across the street on the 7th floor of a parking garage, taking up more and more time.

But if a technical issue makes it impossible for the night to continue without an awkward buzzing sound, or you’re literally incapable of playing any music at all, or speeches can no longer happen (because no microphone will work), then you could make people really upset.

The solutions are pretty obvious:

Have backups of your equipment that you bring to your wedding DJ gigs.
If equipment seems faulty, replace it for good. Don’t just cross your fingers that it’ll work.

This is also why it’s important to arrive to your wedding DJ gigs plenty early. Give yourself time to set up everything and make sure it works properly. It’ll reduce your stress, for one. I’ve found that most technical problems occur before the wedding even starts. For some reason, some cord isn’t working, or there’s interference causing problems with the microphone, or some other issue. It’s better to fix these before people arrive and you’re supposed to be DJing/emceeing.

You’re Unprepared/Disorganized/Unprofessional

This is probably the hardest one to deal with because it reflects on you as a person and a professional.

Luckily, unless you have serious problems with this, you can solve these common issues pretty easily.

Late to the wedding? In the future, start arriving much earlier. Give yourself plenty of breathing room in case something comes up, there’s a traffic jam, etc.

Of course, that won’t help you the night you are late, but apologize profusely to the couple and try to deliver the best possible DJ services you can from then on out that night. You may also consider offering a refund (more on that later).

Mispronounced a name(s)? I’ve done this one. You’re supposed to announce a name – even the couple’s! – and you totally get it wrong. Luckily, this one you can often remedy right then and there. After botching the name, slow down and say it correctly and throw in a self-deprecating joke. When I mispronounced an uncle’s name and a crowd of people shouted the correct pronunciation back at me, I think I earned back their trust when I kept my composure and said, “Well, I’m fired. See ya later, folks!” and pretended to walk away.

DJs are humans too! (Most of them…)

Additionally, I make sure to always practice every name I’ll be announcing when I talk to the couple a few days before the wedding. I also write out phonetically any tricky pronunciations. “Andrea” might not be pronounced like “Ann-dree-uh.” It may be “Ahn-dray-uh” or something else.

Bonus: When people have hard-to-pronounce names and you get it right, they love you! I’ve had multiple surprised reactions, “Wow, you got it right! No one ever does!” Nice!

Disorganized? Unprepared? Perhaps you didn’t have a song you were supposed to have, or you forgot to make an important announcement or make sure something happened at a particular time.

For each wedding, I have couples fill out a Reception Planner. This should answer pretty much all the important questions of the night – music, events, names, etc. Additionally, I also do a consultation a few days before the wedding (whenever is convenient for them). We go over the details and make sure I have everything correct. I take notes in my copy of the Reception Planner so I know everything I need to know:

Every event that’s scheduled to happen (toasts, first dances, bouquet toss, everything), including the estimated time the event will happen (e.g., 7:15 p.m.) and its order in the overall order of events.
How every name that I’ll announce is pronounced. If it’s an uncommon name/pronunciation, I write it down phonetically.
Any specific song they want me to play – plus any songs they don’t want me to play. Important!

When I prepare for the wedding, I make sure I have every song the couple asked for. I’ve also listened to all my copies of the songs to make sure I have the correct songs and versions.

Did the couple ask for no profanity, but the version I have is the explicit one? Okay, then I need to get the clean version. (Note: I also label my song files “[CLEAN]” or “[EXPLICIT]” so I know which version is which, but it’s still good to listen and make sure.)
Are there any unintentional skips/glitches in the song that make it sound bad?
Whoops, is it actually a live version of the song when the couple wants the standard, studio recording?
Anything about the particular song I need to know about? E.g., does it start with 10 seconds of silence; thus, I should skip those first 10 seconds when I play it at the wedding? Etc.

Funny story (maybe): One wedding, the couple asked me to play “Home” by Jasmine Thompson for their first dance, so I did. A few seconds in, they looked at me, “That’s not the right song…”

Uh….

While the guests waited, we quickly huddled at the DJ table. I showed them I was in fact playing “Home” by Jasmine Thompson. I looked it up again in a search engine, and, well, it turns out Jasmine Thompson has two different songs called “Home.” The other one – the song the couple actually wanted – was a cover of “Home” by Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeroes. Ah! This one. I had never had that happen before. We laughed it off, I cued up the correct song, and things went fine from there.

(Note: I don’t play wedding music from YouTube videos. I just included those links for reference here!)

DJs drinking at weddings? A common question is: Is it okay for wedding DJs to drink at weddings? I’ve actually written an entire article on this subject.

There’s not really a definitive yes or no answer. But of course you’re always better off just not drinking when you DJ. Even if a drink doesn’t impair your ability to DJ a wedding, it can simply look bad. People may get the wrong idea or assume you’re totally intoxicated.

That said, some couples actually encourage their DJs to drink. I’ve had couples, without my asking, bring a drink over to me or encourage me to join them in a shot. In this case, well, the couple is giving you the green light to do so. In fact, they may even like you more and think it’s cool their DJ joined in the fun and bonded with them in that way.

Just know your limits, of course.

Certainly if doing that shot or drink with the couple makes you sloppy and mess up, then it’s a clear sign you shouldn’t do that again.

Where’d the DJ go? If you’re a smoker and you have to take breaks throughout the night to step outside for a cigarette, couples will likely get annoyed at the frequent breaks.

If I need to go to the bathroom or step away for a minute during the reception (maybe I left an important item in my car), I always cue up a longer song to give me plenty of time. That way there’s little chance of the song ending and me not being there to start a new one. Some options include:

“Piano Man” by Billy Joel (5:39)
“Hey Jude” by the Beatles (7:04)
“Tiny Dancer” by Elton John (6:18)
“Bittersweet Symphony” by the Verve (5:58)

I guess if you really need a LOT of time, you could play “American Pie” by Don McLean (8:37), but that song can get quite tedious by about, like, the 30th verse.

The point is, keep your breaks to a minimum and be sure you have music covered while you’re away.

Disputes with the couple or their guests? Weddings are stressful! And couples and guests can really push your buttons. It goes without saying (yet here I am saying it), that getting into arguments or confrontations with anyone at the wedding will likely make the night worse.

Do your best to come to an understanding.

It’s better to just grin and bear it and work to make the couple happy, no matter how frustrating it is. (Hey, you can always blare “Break Stuff” by Limp Bizkit on the drive home and scream in your car…)

If someone is truly out of line, then it’s time to get security or the venue’s staff or the wedding coordinator involved. Your job is to emcee and play music, such as “King Fu Fighting,” not literally be doing that at the wedding.

Tip: Check In With the Couple

One easy practice you can do is to check in with the couple two or three times during the wedding. Are they happy with the way things are going? Anything they want done differently? If they voice a frustration or disappointment, anything you can do now to solve that?

This gives you the chance to confront some problems before they get out of control. It also reduces the likelihood that you later get a surprising bad review when you had assumed everything was okay.

After the Wedding

In many cases, a simple heartfelt apology can resolve the issue.

You want to take care of this as soon as possible, before they leave on their honeymoon for a couple weeks or before they've had a chance to leave you a bad review.

Depending on the severity of the issue, an apology might be enough. If you bungled a few names or showed up late, maybe sharing your sincere remorse will be enough to ease the couple's frustration.

If you really screwed up, however, then it may be time to issue refunds, whether $200, half the total amount, or even the entire amount.

Try to put yourself in their shoes - what would you expect?

If they're mad you messed up one song or one name, then a full refund would be absurd. But if your equipment conked out an hour into the reception and you couldn't continue, then yes, a full refund may be appropriate.

Sometimes simply saying, "What can I do to make this right?" can help you determine what the couple wants in terms of apology/refund.

If the issue was just that the dance floor was rather empty that night, then you probably don't need to do anything, unless the couple voiced frustration at this.

I've done plenty of weddings with minimal dancing (it happens to the best of us), and the couple didn't seem to mind.

You can certainly talk to them and ask, "How did you feel everything went?" and see if they bring up any frustrations. If so, then try to remedy those.

But the key is, try to take care of any issues as soon as possible. You don't want the couple to leave angry.

What If You Get a Bad Review?

DJ reviews mean everything to the success of your business. Potential clients pore over them to learn about the vendors they may hire. Reviews are more likely to convince couples to hire you than generic marketing copy on your website/profile promising "Incredible events and amazing music!" and other unproven claims. That's where reviews make the difference.

Some couples leave reviews on their own, while some only do so when prompted.

My practice has been to email the couple two weeks after their wedding, sharing my thanks for hiring me and asking them to leave a review. I include links to several places they could leave me a DJ review (The Knot, WeddingWire, Facebook, etc.).

At the bottom of the email, I say, "If, on the other hand, there was anything you didn't like, feel free to email that to me. I always want to improve my business." After all, I'd rather the couple air their grievances in a private email than in a public place, like The Knot, Facebook, etc.

When I've DJed a wedding that I think just didn't go great (such as very minimal dancing or some pesky technical issues), I think it over and sometimes decide to simply not email the couple, asking for a review.

Of course, they could still leave a review on their own. But you decrease the likelihood because you're no longer sending them a direct request that includes links.

If a potential client sees a bad review, they may be likely to put you in the "no" column fast. Granted, if you have one bad review and a hundred good ones, depending on how awful the bad review is, they may be willing to overlook that.

A bad review doesn't mean your business is history and it's time to find a new line of work either. But how you handle the bad review can mean everything.

Luckily, most websites with reviews allow you, the vendor, to respond. This is huge! Anyone reading the bad review can then see your side of things.

Not only that, they can see how you handle criticism. Do you genuinely apologize and offer a valid excuse or start chewing out the bad reviewer, name calling and making it worse?

Remember that any type of rebuttal is not so much your chance to get back at them but rather to ease the concerns of potential future clients who may see the bad review.

So what should you include in your response?

A genuine apology. "I'm so sorry my services didn't live up to your wishes."
Valid excuses. Perhaps there's a totally fair, reasonable explanation for why something didn't go the way the couple wanted. Empty dance floor? You could share that you were following the detailed song list the couple provided and that most people were outside playing cornhole and other lawn games.
Corrections. Keep your tone friendly, but if the couple accuses you of something that simply isn't true, it's important to set the record straight - again, in a level-headed way. Did they accuse you of being drunk when you hadn't had a drop of alcohol? Then it's important to say so. "I never drink at weddings, and I didn't drink at yours. If you saw a drink on my table, it was likely one of the guests who left empty bottles on my table throughout the night."
Promises for better service in the future. In addition to apologizing, explain how you'll remedy the situation so it doesn't happen in the future. "I'm sorry for the technical issues we encountered that night. I've now replaced my wireless microphone system and purchased an additional one as further backup in the future." Even though this doesn't benefit the couple that's currently mad, potential future clients may see it and be impressed.
Offer of further ways to right the situation. It doesn't hurt to include in your response that, "I'll be contacting you to provide a full refund" or other remedies. Potential future clients like seeing you're willing to right the situation, even though the wedding is already over.

Remember, there's always the chance that your response eases the couple's frustration so much that they then delete their review or modify it to be more favorable. If so, great! That's exactly what you want. But even if not, a well-written response can help you save face with future potential clients.

If the review is totally out of line, such as the couple is threatening, it's someone you never even DJed for, or it's full of blatant, harmful lies, it's important to reach out to the vendor support for the website (Yelp, Google, Facebook, whomever) and see about getting the review removed. It's not fair for your business to take a hit for something that is blatantly false or threatening to you.

Learn and Get Better

Hey, sometimes weddings go bad! DJs mess up or have things outside of their control that make the night go poorly. Right the situation with the client and learn from it. If you get a bad review, handle it professionally and you should still be fine.